Grasp. That is this week's FMF topic.
Grasp. I immediately thought of what I'm grasping for.
I'm grasping for . . . how does one put this? I am grasping for security. Currently I do not have a full time job like I enjoyed last school year. God has been providing so amazingly. I have a tutoring job that I love and the parents keep paying me more than I ask for. God has provided random dog sitting jobs that pay more than I expected. So He is providing.
But meanwhile, my car has needed two random, expensive repairs in the last month or so. And dog sitting last week was cancelled. And I found out my bachelor's degree isn't from a regionally accredited university so I can't apply to be a substitute teacher or earn a teacher's credential so that I can make money.
So I am grasping. I am grasping for security.
God has led me here. That's what I must remind myself of. Because I know it is true. It has been obviously true.
I am grasping because I want to control my life.
And that is what it is -- grasping. Not resting. Not trusting. Not praying. Not entrusting myself to the One in charge. Frantic grasping for the wind.
Five Minute Friday parade!
"God loves an uttermost confidence in Himself -- to be wholly trusted. This is the sublimest of all the characteristics of a true Christian -- the basis of all character." --Henry Van Dyke